Fellas!
Do you know how a woman lets go? She does it when she feels really comfortable and secure. She needs to trust the man she is with. Because women have been so abused and suppressed for thousands of years, it has become apart of the genetic inheritance not to trust a man.
Who can blame them? Men treat women as objects, as animals that are to be hunted and tamed, to obey and submit to the will of our "superiority". Women get hurt by men all the time. I am not suggesting that all women are angels, but the ones who act psychopathically are often trying to meet men on their own ground.
Women are amazing, because they can, through their sexuality, reach a higher level of consciousness. We men can also reach a higher level of consciousness, but often we have to choose the meditative route. But a part of the worshiping of the divine is to realize the divine nature of the sexual energy present in a woman, namely the kundulani energy in her ovaries.
Because of the suppression, many women are not even aware of this energy in their own bodies, or because of the guilt attached to experiencing sexual pleasure, are scared to explore this path.
Some women mistakenly, in my opinion, used sex toys - inanimate articles, to stimulate themselves further than they can stimulate themselves. Because you have probably noticed that it is very hard to tickle yourself.
By gaining the real trust of a woman, it is possible to allow her to move into a zone of ecstacy, where by experiencing orgasmic plateaus, over a period of time, move ever higher and away from this realm. It is a beautiful thing to experience and it is mans' true role on Earth.
When I say trust, I don't mean to try and fool your partner. This trust takes time to build up and if it is not real, any woman will see right through it. Do not rush it. It takes empathy and sympathy, listening and kind gestures. Show her that you will never harm her.
You will know when she trusts you when you ask her to masturbate in front of you.
Now from a man's point of view, this can be a difficult thing to ask; many men have the idea that when a woman masturbates, it is a direct insult to his sexual prowess. That she is thinking about someone else. This is horribly selfish thinking. Just because many men jerk off with an image of a woman of their choice does not mean that women do the same! No, women are more sophisticated that that! She is pleasuring herself, touching and caressing the parts that she herself would like her lover to pleasure - if she could trust him that far.
From a woman's point of view, this can be extremely embarrassing, especially if she has been brought up to believe that masturbation is evil. Up to a few years ago, women would not admit to masturbation, whereas 98% of men did. (I think it was Alfred Kinsey who said the other 2% were liars!). Now, women admit in confidential surveys that they do. Why should it be any different from men to women? It is actually a lot easier for a woman to conceal, because a man has dispose of the sperm on ejaculation and he can only do it so may times in a day.
But is is still taboo. So a woman has to trust - implicitly.
What is the point, here? Women have different ways of masturbation, but essentially it goes from stimulation of the skin, to the breasts, the thighs and then the clitoris. Many do not insert their fingers into their vaginas. As a man, your initial task is to observe, silently. Do nothing. Just watch and see what happens. Take note of how long it takes. If your partner is comfortable (and this may take some days), she will be able to get to orgasm. You may ask her what pleases her most and she may let you try to replicate it. Real gentleness is required. If you don't know what I mean, think about women grabbing your cock - hurts sometimes, doesn't it?
Let her tell you what works and what doesn't. Start intimacy by holding her and laying close to her the full length of your bodies. Allow her to touch herself and when she starts breathing heavily and moaning, often with her tongue flicking, gently kiss her face and lips.
Allow her to proceed at her own speed. Tantric massage is the requirement here, to channel the sexual energy up through the chakras. Observe the state she is in. Whisper reassurances or repeat a low "Om" sound in her ears, like a bell - deep and ringing. Follow her hands and fingers as she gets higher. The transition will come, for you to eventually take over.
This process cannot be rushed. It takes time and patience and a secure and comfortable place. If you are into meditation, this should be preceded by meditation to clear the minds.
It may lead to full intercourse, or not. If it doesn't, feel happy that you have helped your partner to where she wants to be. This is your role.
Please look at this video, how women can achieve orgasm during childbirth:
mandag den 5. december 2011
søndag den 9. oktober 2011
10 ways to prepare for Tantric Sex
- Get fit. One of the worst aspects of modern life is that there are far too many obese and unfit people around. That is so sad, because in my opinion, one cannot really reach the levels of subconsciousness unless you have a healthy body. To experience deep sensuous feelings, you have to be aware of your body, because that is the channel that you are using in tantric love making. I believe that many people overeat because they have little spiritual sexuality in their lives. It is possible to get fit by tantric sex!
- Swim. When the secrets of tantra were being written down, I doubt that swimming was a form of exercise practiced by many. Now we have good facilities for swimming and I am sure that if swimming pools were around 2,500 years ago, swimming would have been an integral part of yoga. Because swimming is total body exercise and when you are in the rhythm of swimming, you can meditate. Additionally, when you are in a pool of like-minded people, you share a spirituality with them.
- Shun drugs and alcohol. You don't need them. No drugs can emulate the real present moment awareness of tantric love making. They will slow you down and you will become a slave to them.
- Eat well. Heavy foods are not conducive to love making and farting and belching will not enhance the experience. Eat light meals regularly, with lots of fruits and vegetables, preferably plucked fresh from the tree as they are full of pranic, or life-force, energy.
- Practice Yoga. Yoga is an amazing exercise as it helps get you fit, opens channels in your body to cultivate sexual energy and allows you to meditate better. Do yoga with your partner as a prelude to tantric sex.
- Meditate. Meditate before and after tantric sex, using the love that you have for your tantric partner as the object of your meditation. Let the previous experience arise in your mind and thank your partner for the joy it brought.
- Time. Give yourself plenty of time and be spontaneous. You cannot plan a time for tantric sex, but rather look for the opportunity by performing acts of love constantly. Do not rush. Remember that just looking into your partner's eyes is making love.
- Mutual Respect. You must have mutual respect for each other. You both come to this sacred act as equals, like an indenture that has to fit together to be valid.
- Place. The place where you make tantric love is a temple, a place where you worship each other, finding the Shiva and Shakti in each other. Make sure that the environment is calm and inviting, a safe place where you won't be disturbed or distracted.
- Symbols. Use symbols of your sacred union to remind you of why you are together. Use oils or incense burners to create the ambiance.
Most of the above would seem obvious, but few couples give themselves the optimal conditions to reach a higher level of consciousness. Many will tick the boxes and say that they already do that, but just think about it.Are you as fit as you could be? Are you eating the right diet? Do you give yourself the time to reach deeper every time you make love?
Think about it. Namaste.
onsdag den 24. august 2011
Time to get political about Tantra?
I watched an interesting video by David Wilcock. He says that 2012 is an important year, where humanity will make it or break it. It is a date highlighted by the Mayan and Egyptian calenders. It is the dawn of the Age of Aquarius.
I look around me and see what is happening. It is a fact that many more people have the same thoughts and feelings as I do. This is a factor of the search for spirituality by the Baby Boomers and the post-war European generation. We have the resources to be forward thinking. We have seen a sexual revolution, the emancipation of women, birth control, liberalism. We want more.
The feminist movement has been very aggressive in asserting the rights of women - perhaps too aggressive, because they have not carried all the women forward. The hard core despise men. Others know that they need something from men, but cannot define it, leaving "soft" men bewildered and "hard" men even more macho than before.
What should have happened is that women recognised their true sexuality and then educated the men on exactly what they wanted. Then the men willing to learn would have been able to do what men are good at, namely worshiping their women through their sexuality, or they would have literally died out.
To a degree this is happening, I agree. But it is happening in pockets - the traditional areas of liberal thinking, such as Hawaii, California and Northern Europe. Just a small fraction of the world.
We are faced with a fork in the path; The two scenarios are as follows:
1) The dark forces take over. By religious fundamentalism, chauvinism again comes to the fore and men are "empowered" to treat women as farm animals, as happens in many parts of the world. The lack of females in India and China causes men to dominate merely by being in the majority. In North America, Europe and Australasia, more interference in peoples' private lives "in the interests of your security", becomes a method of control. Sex becomes a purely commercial consumerist function, like drinking and eating are now. You can have as much as you like as long as you are paying someone for the privilege. Pig out, like people do on fast food and sugary drinks, with fast sex.
2) We do, indeed, enter, the Age of Aquarius, where women universally understand that they are liberated through their own sexuality and that they can reach a higher level of consciousness with a lover that understands love. Loving and sex begins with a smile and develops to a deep, sacred relationship between adults, regardless of age, cultural background or skin color. People trust each other and the universal law of Karma is embraced as The Law. We learn that we are all gods and that together we understand that we are Nature and therefore will do all to protect our lineage.
So, sisters, it is up to you. You must lead this revolution. Learn to love yourself and bury generations of inherited low self-esteem. Find a Dakini or a Tantrika and know what it can be really like and then find a partner who can help you transcend.
Many women around the world need to be shaken out of the shackles they find themselves in - whether by bullying men, intolerant religion, children from a very early age or the disease of consumerism.
I am an optimist: I prefer the Age of Aquarius outcome :-)
I look around me and see what is happening. It is a fact that many more people have the same thoughts and feelings as I do. This is a factor of the search for spirituality by the Baby Boomers and the post-war European generation. We have the resources to be forward thinking. We have seen a sexual revolution, the emancipation of women, birth control, liberalism. We want more.
The feminist movement has been very aggressive in asserting the rights of women - perhaps too aggressive, because they have not carried all the women forward. The hard core despise men. Others know that they need something from men, but cannot define it, leaving "soft" men bewildered and "hard" men even more macho than before.
What should have happened is that women recognised their true sexuality and then educated the men on exactly what they wanted. Then the men willing to learn would have been able to do what men are good at, namely worshiping their women through their sexuality, or they would have literally died out.
To a degree this is happening, I agree. But it is happening in pockets - the traditional areas of liberal thinking, such as Hawaii, California and Northern Europe. Just a small fraction of the world.
We are faced with a fork in the path; The two scenarios are as follows:
1) The dark forces take over. By religious fundamentalism, chauvinism again comes to the fore and men are "empowered" to treat women as farm animals, as happens in many parts of the world. The lack of females in India and China causes men to dominate merely by being in the majority. In North America, Europe and Australasia, more interference in peoples' private lives "in the interests of your security", becomes a method of control. Sex becomes a purely commercial consumerist function, like drinking and eating are now. You can have as much as you like as long as you are paying someone for the privilege. Pig out, like people do on fast food and sugary drinks, with fast sex.
2) We do, indeed, enter, the Age of Aquarius, where women universally understand that they are liberated through their own sexuality and that they can reach a higher level of consciousness with a lover that understands love. Loving and sex begins with a smile and develops to a deep, sacred relationship between adults, regardless of age, cultural background or skin color. People trust each other and the universal law of Karma is embraced as The Law. We learn that we are all gods and that together we understand that we are Nature and therefore will do all to protect our lineage.
So, sisters, it is up to you. You must lead this revolution. Learn to love yourself and bury generations of inherited low self-esteem. Find a Dakini or a Tantrika and know what it can be really like and then find a partner who can help you transcend.
Many women around the world need to be shaken out of the shackles they find themselves in - whether by bullying men, intolerant religion, children from a very early age or the disease of consumerism.
I am an optimist: I prefer the Age of Aquarius outcome :-)
onsdag den 17. august 2011
Zombies and Rogues
It is amazing how kids are totally involved in World of Warcraft. It panders to their "blue" meme development. Their are zombies, elves, gnomes, rogues, wizards, etc. It seems to me types of characters are reflected in real life.
In my experience, most people are zombies.Those who have not had their sexual/spiritual awakening are the living dead. You can see it in their eyes, on their faces, the way they walk. Unless, of course, everyone is acting - putting up a facade - but I doubt that. There is too much in the world's cultures to conspire against real life.
Others are rogues. Mainly men, who live on a constant overdose of testosterone. They see sex as something entirely and utterly for their own satisfaction and as a tool of power over "weaker" beings - mainly women, but in the worst case, children.
This is a totally sad situation. It makes being in public places a very depressing experience. People are scared - scared of contact, scared of risking showing what they know is inside them, scared of having bad experiences, scared of their sexuality.
So, many (mainly women) suppress it, and others (men) flaunt it in a vile way. Such is it, that many women in the world, instead of going outside with the prospect of meeting a partner who is going to give them the greatest satisfaction in their lives, go out with the fear of being accosted by "rogues", or even worse, being raped by a stupid, egotistical, testosterone-driven man.
And there is the suppression: I perform sports massage to people who have muscular pain. I can feel the level of sexual awareness in people, but being bound by ethical standards, do nothing to take advantage of it. But the difference is astounding: Even in healthy people, there is often no reaction to sensuous touch. This can be for two reasons: one, that the reaction is being suppressed (there and then), or the "circuit is dead", because of suppression as a part of the culture or background of the person. There is also the massive taboo nowadays of being touched at all.
When the clients are so relaxed under massage, it is hard to believe that they are actively suppressing their reactions. So, one may assumed, albeit dogmatically, that these people do not have the sexual awareness that could be considered natural.
But some do. Only a small percentage. Perhaps 1%. This corresponds to Ken Wilber's estimate of the people (in North America and Europe) in the yellow/turquoise memes (holonic). Is that a correlation? Or am I saying that it is the same people who are in both groups.
Does this mean that to make the sexual/spiritual connection, you have to have the necessary experience and have developed through the memes? Perhaps.
The fact is, that as human beings, we all have the potential to realize the Shiva and Shakti inside us. So, why don't we? Because contemporary life conspires against this. Consumerism has totally taken over. The message is that you have to get your pleasure from something you pay for, such as eating and drinking, and pornographic sex. Made cheap enough for everyone to indulge, of course, but the results are plain and obvious: Massive numbers of overweight people who are so out of touch with their bodies, they cannot possibly indulge in tantric lovemaking. Alcoholics and drug takers, seeking a thrill, which they could easily get from spiritual pursuits such as meditation and tantra. Smoking, which seems to create a false meditative state. Sex, so that women operate sexually on the same level as testosterone-filled males, looking for "performance" and sexual variations and deviations. Flitting from partner to partner and still having that empty feeling after all.
This is mainly in Western societies, but all these facets are being adopted in Asia and elsewhere, because it is being sold as "normal". Meanwhile, spirituality, especially sexual spirituality is considered "weird", or is mistaken as lust and promiscuity. And it certainly can be abused (see my earlier posts). It is strange that social media can flourish, showing the need for personal relationships, but people shun physical contact.
There are some brave people out there. Mainly women, who want to spread the word and educate men and women in the art of sexual spirituality. The real Tantrikas and Dakinis put themselves at risk from rogues and many are good at converting the rogues into something useful.
There are many women who have lived and experienced enough to start making the connection. They have had children, been slave to a man for much of their lives and connect with their own masculine sides. They have to really fight to break out of cultural and religious prisons. They go through a lot of pain and self-doubt, often having to regain their self-worth. They have to overcome their experience of men and bury the prejudice that most men are useless idiots (they are!). They are vulnerable to so -called "gurus", who will lead them to retreats in Romania or India , where they are emotionally raped. In finding new relationships, they have to run the gauntlet of men who want them to perform some form of sexual kinkiness to be accepted.
There are some brave men as well.
I wish that there were less zombies and rogues around. I wish that religions stopped oppressing women. I wish that women could start to live. What is needed is more women to take the path and instead of making enemies of men, as some aspects of the Feminist movement have done, start to educate the men. If women know what they really want, they should be able to teach men that. Soft men are OK, but girls, don't psychologically castrate the men. You love the strength of a man and the security it gives.
So, there we have the state of the world. I cannot speak about the non-Western world, but I doubt that in Asia, there are that many enlightened women. Probably not in the Arab countries. In Africa, maybe. But women have a very rough deal in most of Africa. If we take one-half percent of the grown women in Western societies, we are talking of perhaps 20 million women who have realized the purpose of their lives beyond procreation and in some cases, career. There are some 3 billion women who need to be shown, and this is where the Feminist movement should concentrate its efforts.
The Dark Forces of fundamentalism are at large. Women are not being liberated. Chauvinism is on the way back in. As a man, I have learned that women are to be worshiped, but it is oh, so easy for men to revert to being bullies and treating women as farmyard animals. Even in Western societies. Beware of this.
Deep love and satisfaction is possible for every woman. Reaching a higher level of consciousness (super consciousness) is realistic. "Going solo" (masturbation) is a move in the right direction, but the intimacy and ying-yang effect of an empathic partner will allow for the attainment of higher levels.
And brother: You rogue. I know you, I have been there myself. For many years I treated women as objects and subjects of material deviations. External. Apart. Who cares what she thought, as long as she looked good and I could boast of my prowess. Who cared about the concerns of a mere woman!
This is the message to my brothers: Learn Tantra or Tao. Start to understand that the greatest thrill is to help a woman achieve orgasm. Not "give her an orgasm". She can only give herself an orgasm. But when she is in that trance-like state, you are really loving her. You are fulfilling the conditions for something sacred and magic. If you are good at it, you will be able to help develop her skills. She has a lot of prejudice to overcome.
Tenderness and gentleness are the keywords.
Do it. You will never regret and by doing it, you will make the world a better place.
In my experience, most people are zombies.Those who have not had their sexual/spiritual awakening are the living dead. You can see it in their eyes, on their faces, the way they walk. Unless, of course, everyone is acting - putting up a facade - but I doubt that. There is too much in the world's cultures to conspire against real life.
Others are rogues. Mainly men, who live on a constant overdose of testosterone. They see sex as something entirely and utterly for their own satisfaction and as a tool of power over "weaker" beings - mainly women, but in the worst case, children.
This is a totally sad situation. It makes being in public places a very depressing experience. People are scared - scared of contact, scared of risking showing what they know is inside them, scared of having bad experiences, scared of their sexuality.
So, many (mainly women) suppress it, and others (men) flaunt it in a vile way. Such is it, that many women in the world, instead of going outside with the prospect of meeting a partner who is going to give them the greatest satisfaction in their lives, go out with the fear of being accosted by "rogues", or even worse, being raped by a stupid, egotistical, testosterone-driven man.
And there is the suppression: I perform sports massage to people who have muscular pain. I can feel the level of sexual awareness in people, but being bound by ethical standards, do nothing to take advantage of it. But the difference is astounding: Even in healthy people, there is often no reaction to sensuous touch. This can be for two reasons: one, that the reaction is being suppressed (there and then), or the "circuit is dead", because of suppression as a part of the culture or background of the person. There is also the massive taboo nowadays of being touched at all.
When the clients are so relaxed under massage, it is hard to believe that they are actively suppressing their reactions. So, one may assumed, albeit dogmatically, that these people do not have the sexual awareness that could be considered natural.
But some do. Only a small percentage. Perhaps 1%. This corresponds to Ken Wilber's estimate of the people (in North America and Europe) in the yellow/turquoise memes (holonic). Is that a correlation? Or am I saying that it is the same people who are in both groups.
Does this mean that to make the sexual/spiritual connection, you have to have the necessary experience and have developed through the memes? Perhaps.
The fact is, that as human beings, we all have the potential to realize the Shiva and Shakti inside us. So, why don't we? Because contemporary life conspires against this. Consumerism has totally taken over. The message is that you have to get your pleasure from something you pay for, such as eating and drinking, and pornographic sex. Made cheap enough for everyone to indulge, of course, but the results are plain and obvious: Massive numbers of overweight people who are so out of touch with their bodies, they cannot possibly indulge in tantric lovemaking. Alcoholics and drug takers, seeking a thrill, which they could easily get from spiritual pursuits such as meditation and tantra. Smoking, which seems to create a false meditative state. Sex, so that women operate sexually on the same level as testosterone-filled males, looking for "performance" and sexual variations and deviations. Flitting from partner to partner and still having that empty feeling after all.
This is mainly in Western societies, but all these facets are being adopted in Asia and elsewhere, because it is being sold as "normal". Meanwhile, spirituality, especially sexual spirituality is considered "weird", or is mistaken as lust and promiscuity. And it certainly can be abused (see my earlier posts). It is strange that social media can flourish, showing the need for personal relationships, but people shun physical contact.
There are some brave people out there. Mainly women, who want to spread the word and educate men and women in the art of sexual spirituality. The real Tantrikas and Dakinis put themselves at risk from rogues and many are good at converting the rogues into something useful.
There are many women who have lived and experienced enough to start making the connection. They have had children, been slave to a man for much of their lives and connect with their own masculine sides. They have to really fight to break out of cultural and religious prisons. They go through a lot of pain and self-doubt, often having to regain their self-worth. They have to overcome their experience of men and bury the prejudice that most men are useless idiots (they are!). They are vulnerable to so -called "gurus", who will lead them to retreats in Romania or India , where they are emotionally raped. In finding new relationships, they have to run the gauntlet of men who want them to perform some form of sexual kinkiness to be accepted.
There are some brave men as well.
I wish that there were less zombies and rogues around. I wish that religions stopped oppressing women. I wish that women could start to live. What is needed is more women to take the path and instead of making enemies of men, as some aspects of the Feminist movement have done, start to educate the men. If women know what they really want, they should be able to teach men that. Soft men are OK, but girls, don't psychologically castrate the men. You love the strength of a man and the security it gives.
So, there we have the state of the world. I cannot speak about the non-Western world, but I doubt that in Asia, there are that many enlightened women. Probably not in the Arab countries. In Africa, maybe. But women have a very rough deal in most of Africa. If we take one-half percent of the grown women in Western societies, we are talking of perhaps 20 million women who have realized the purpose of their lives beyond procreation and in some cases, career. There are some 3 billion women who need to be shown, and this is where the Feminist movement should concentrate its efforts.
The Dark Forces of fundamentalism are at large. Women are not being liberated. Chauvinism is on the way back in. As a man, I have learned that women are to be worshiped, but it is oh, so easy for men to revert to being bullies and treating women as farmyard animals. Even in Western societies. Beware of this.
Deep love and satisfaction is possible for every woman. Reaching a higher level of consciousness (super consciousness) is realistic. "Going solo" (masturbation) is a move in the right direction, but the intimacy and ying-yang effect of an empathic partner will allow for the attainment of higher levels.
And brother: You rogue. I know you, I have been there myself. For many years I treated women as objects and subjects of material deviations. External. Apart. Who cares what she thought, as long as she looked good and I could boast of my prowess. Who cared about the concerns of a mere woman!
This is the message to my brothers: Learn Tantra or Tao. Start to understand that the greatest thrill is to help a woman achieve orgasm. Not "give her an orgasm". She can only give herself an orgasm. But when she is in that trance-like state, you are really loving her. You are fulfilling the conditions for something sacred and magic. If you are good at it, you will be able to help develop her skills. She has a lot of prejudice to overcome.
Tenderness and gentleness are the keywords.
Do it. You will never regret and by doing it, you will make the world a better place.
fredag den 12. august 2011
Sex and Spirituality
A friend of mine had written a blog which talked about sex and spirituality. He made a mention of this blog in social media and one of his female friends commented: "You can't be sexual and spiritual at the same time?". Kind of a statement and question at the same time, which appears to me that she was confused or naive.
The whole point is that sexuality and spirituality are the same. Especially for women. The unfortunate, nay, tragic part is that the vast majority of women do not seem to appreciate this.
Ken Wilber, whom I greatly respect as a thinker, refers to "memes" and the development that individuals and societies have to go through to reach a level of spirituality. The sexual development clearly takes the same path. So it does not surprise me that the vast majority are not "there" yet. It is in the interests of the lower hierarchical memes to hold people away from the realization that sex and spirituality are inextricably linked.
But like with everything else, people reason and by reasoning and thinking, get to understand more. The ironic thing about sex is that people often make that realization when they are not physically able to do anything about it, because they have gotten old and their bodies begin to break down. Which could have been delayed if they had listened more to their bodies and explored their minds.
Women have the wonderful opportunity of reaching a higher level of conciousness through their bodies. A woman's body is an amazing total sexual organ and by cultivating the sexual energy, can transform it into their minds. Unfortunately for the majority of us men, we have to sit and stare at a wall to achieve the same, by meditation.
Speaking as a man and an observer, I think the majority of women know this. They explore there bodies at an early age, but then, through guilt or approbation, are told that this is "unhealthy". A new study reveals 92% of women regularly take time out to masturbate, a huge jump from the findings of previous studies (74% in 1979 and 62% in 1953). We are heading in the right direction, for sure.
But many women stop here, because men cannot come to terms with this, or lesbianism. Men think that a women who rejects "them" as a "lover" (sic) is some kind of traitor. Women know this, so rarely admit to a man that they masturbate.
However, getting the confidence of a woman to admit this and even better, getting into a relaxed position to show you, as a partner, what she does and how she best stimulate herself can help her get to the higher levels. Why? I could guess that in pre-historic times, a woman knew she was vulnerable when she was in the "zone", therefore having a man to protect her was important. I think this is still valid today, and the appeal of a strong, protective but sensitive man is very important to women.
In any case, the intimacy of a man and the sharing of the experience will help the woman reach, by stages, a higher spiritual level. Here, the man should worship his Shakti woman, whispering encouragement into her ears, caressing her, stroking her body, kissing her gently while she does what she does best. It is being there without getting involved. Guys, forget your egos, forget the self-interest and concentrate on assisting your love partner to ecstasy and bliss.
This ego-lessness will give you a wonderful feeling of giving and while she is on this high level, or plateau, and stops for a while, she will probably want you to penetrate her, gently. This will lead to the most amazing love making.
She will learn that sex and spirituality are the same thing and will thank you for helping her confirm this. Thank her, for letting you help her make this connection and kneel, or sit cross-legged in front of each other and bow in Namaste.
Sexuality = Spirituality
The whole point is that sexuality and spirituality are the same. Especially for women. The unfortunate, nay, tragic part is that the vast majority of women do not seem to appreciate this.
Ken Wilber, whom I greatly respect as a thinker, refers to "memes" and the development that individuals and societies have to go through to reach a level of spirituality. The sexual development clearly takes the same path. So it does not surprise me that the vast majority are not "there" yet. It is in the interests of the lower hierarchical memes to hold people away from the realization that sex and spirituality are inextricably linked.
But like with everything else, people reason and by reasoning and thinking, get to understand more. The ironic thing about sex is that people often make that realization when they are not physically able to do anything about it, because they have gotten old and their bodies begin to break down. Which could have been delayed if they had listened more to their bodies and explored their minds.
Women have the wonderful opportunity of reaching a higher level of conciousness through their bodies. A woman's body is an amazing total sexual organ and by cultivating the sexual energy, can transform it into their minds. Unfortunately for the majority of us men, we have to sit and stare at a wall to achieve the same, by meditation.
Speaking as a man and an observer, I think the majority of women know this. They explore there bodies at an early age, but then, through guilt or approbation, are told that this is "unhealthy". A new study reveals 92% of women regularly take time out to masturbate, a huge jump from the findings of previous studies (74% in 1979 and 62% in 1953). We are heading in the right direction, for sure.
But many women stop here, because men cannot come to terms with this, or lesbianism. Men think that a women who rejects "them" as a "lover" (sic) is some kind of traitor. Women know this, so rarely admit to a man that they masturbate.
However, getting the confidence of a woman to admit this and even better, getting into a relaxed position to show you, as a partner, what she does and how she best stimulate herself can help her get to the higher levels. Why? I could guess that in pre-historic times, a woman knew she was vulnerable when she was in the "zone", therefore having a man to protect her was important. I think this is still valid today, and the appeal of a strong, protective but sensitive man is very important to women.
In any case, the intimacy of a man and the sharing of the experience will help the woman reach, by stages, a higher spiritual level. Here, the man should worship his Shakti woman, whispering encouragement into her ears, caressing her, stroking her body, kissing her gently while she does what she does best. It is being there without getting involved. Guys, forget your egos, forget the self-interest and concentrate on assisting your love partner to ecstasy and bliss.
This ego-lessness will give you a wonderful feeling of giving and while she is on this high level, or plateau, and stops for a while, she will probably want you to penetrate her, gently. This will lead to the most amazing love making.
She will learn that sex and spirituality are the same thing and will thank you for helping her confirm this. Thank her, for letting you help her make this connection and kneel, or sit cross-legged in front of each other and bow in Namaste.
Sexuality = Spirituality
mandag den 8. august 2011
Tantric Goddesses
I constantly try to learn more - from people and books, web sites, YouTube, etc. The most important source of my knowledge has been my Divine Love Goddess, whose realization and awakening of her sexuality was accompanied by my practicing what I had learned. It has been a wonderful journey so far. She is open. She knows that she has to fight her cultural and religious upbringing to bring to the front the things she knew as a woman.
It may sound naive, but I never thought that I would find a woman who had a Shakti nature. But all women have a Shakti nature. Our "modern" society and the efforts of men over milenia has buried all this to a very deep level. It takes a woman who is brave and open to awaken the serpent within. It also takes a man who has taken the time to study and has broken down his testosterone-driven ego to allow a woman to bring it out.
Some women have found out through self-discovery and believe that no man can ever create the intimacy required. Others seek other women, who understand the subtleties of Shakti nature.
The Internet is populated with many women, claiming to be "Tantra Goddesses", ready to show men, or couples, the Secrets of Tantra. Some are well meaning, but I am reminded of what the Buddhist Master Lhi Chi said "If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him" . So are solicitations on the Internet (through many Facebook pages) just thinly-veiled prostitutes?
I would say that to have any success with Tantra, love has to be involved. You have to love yourself and love the woman, her body, mind, spirit and womb. Can this be done in a "session". If the Goddess is not offering sex, but her wisdom, then it is perfectly acceptable. But beware - because there seems to be a thin line between spiritual sexuality and promiscuous sex and for men, the latter can be a temptation, a short cut to carnal pleasure. That is not what it is about.
I am sure that many of the women (and men) offering their services are doing a good and worthy job, but it must be difficult to distance oneself from the "client", at the same time imparting deep, intimate knowledge.
In the US, it seems that the society is big and spacious enough to accept that tantra teachers can exist. I am sorry to say that in Europe, it is not so: there are still too many taboos, and an attitude that a sexually-aware woman is a "witch". An enlightened man over the age of 45 is a "dirty old man".
So how does the message get across? With difficulty. But one thing is for sure. The future of humanity requires a turnaround where men learn to worship women. Every man and every woman has the divinity within. Women must listen to there instincts and men must be open to learn. Believe me, it is worth it.
It may sound naive, but I never thought that I would find a woman who had a Shakti nature. But all women have a Shakti nature. Our "modern" society and the efforts of men over milenia has buried all this to a very deep level. It takes a woman who is brave and open to awaken the serpent within. It also takes a man who has taken the time to study and has broken down his testosterone-driven ego to allow a woman to bring it out.
Some women have found out through self-discovery and believe that no man can ever create the intimacy required. Others seek other women, who understand the subtleties of Shakti nature.
The Internet is populated with many women, claiming to be "Tantra Goddesses", ready to show men, or couples, the Secrets of Tantra. Some are well meaning, but I am reminded of what the Buddhist Master Lhi Chi said "If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him" . So are solicitations on the Internet (through many Facebook pages) just thinly-veiled prostitutes?
I would say that to have any success with Tantra, love has to be involved. You have to love yourself and love the woman, her body, mind, spirit and womb. Can this be done in a "session". If the Goddess is not offering sex, but her wisdom, then it is perfectly acceptable. But beware - because there seems to be a thin line between spiritual sexuality and promiscuous sex and for men, the latter can be a temptation, a short cut to carnal pleasure. That is not what it is about.
I am sure that many of the women (and men) offering their services are doing a good and worthy job, but it must be difficult to distance oneself from the "client", at the same time imparting deep, intimate knowledge.
In the US, it seems that the society is big and spacious enough to accept that tantra teachers can exist. I am sorry to say that in Europe, it is not so: there are still too many taboos, and an attitude that a sexually-aware woman is a "witch". An enlightened man over the age of 45 is a "dirty old man".
So how does the message get across? With difficulty. But one thing is for sure. The future of humanity requires a turnaround where men learn to worship women. Every man and every woman has the divinity within. Women must listen to there instincts and men must be open to learn. Believe me, it is worth it.
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