Fellas!
Do you know how a woman lets go? She does it when she feels really comfortable and secure. She needs to trust the man she is with. Because women have been so abused and suppressed for thousands of years, it has become apart of the genetic inheritance not to trust a man.
Who can blame them? Men treat women as objects, as animals that are to be hunted and tamed, to obey and submit to the will of our "superiority". Women get hurt by men all the time. I am not suggesting that all women are angels, but the ones who act psychopathically are often trying to meet men on their own ground.
Women are amazing, because they can, through their sexuality, reach a higher level of consciousness. We men can also reach a higher level of consciousness, but often we have to choose the meditative route. But a part of the worshiping of the divine is to realize the divine nature of the sexual energy present in a woman, namely the kundulani energy in her ovaries.
Because of the suppression, many women are not even aware of this energy in their own bodies, or because of the guilt attached to experiencing sexual pleasure, are scared to explore this path.
Some women mistakenly, in my opinion, used sex toys - inanimate articles, to stimulate themselves further than they can stimulate themselves. Because you have probably noticed that it is very hard to tickle yourself.
By gaining the real trust of a woman, it is possible to allow her to move into a zone of ecstacy, where by experiencing orgasmic plateaus, over a period of time, move ever higher and away from this realm. It is a beautiful thing to experience and it is mans' true role on Earth.
When I say trust, I don't mean to try and fool your partner. This trust takes time to build up and if it is not real, any woman will see right through it. Do not rush it. It takes empathy and sympathy, listening and kind gestures. Show her that you will never harm her.
You will know when she trusts you when you ask her to masturbate in front of you.
Now from a man's point of view, this can be a difficult thing to ask; many men have the idea that when a woman masturbates, it is a direct insult to his sexual prowess. That she is thinking about someone else. This is horribly selfish thinking. Just because many men jerk off with an image of a woman of their choice does not mean that women do the same! No, women are more sophisticated that that! She is pleasuring herself, touching and caressing the parts that she herself would like her lover to pleasure - if she could trust him that far.
From a woman's point of view, this can be extremely embarrassing, especially if she has been brought up to believe that masturbation is evil. Up to a few years ago, women would not admit to masturbation, whereas 98% of men did. (I think it was Alfred Kinsey who said the other 2% were liars!). Now, women admit in confidential surveys that they do. Why should it be any different from men to women? It is actually a lot easier for a woman to conceal, because a man has dispose of the sperm on ejaculation and he can only do it so may times in a day.
But is is still taboo. So a woman has to trust - implicitly.
What is the point, here? Women have different ways of masturbation, but essentially it goes from stimulation of the skin, to the breasts, the thighs and then the clitoris. Many do not insert their fingers into their vaginas. As a man, your initial task is to observe, silently. Do nothing. Just watch and see what happens. Take note of how long it takes. If your partner is comfortable (and this may take some days), she will be able to get to orgasm. You may ask her what pleases her most and she may let you try to replicate it. Real gentleness is required. If you don't know what I mean, think about women grabbing your cock - hurts sometimes, doesn't it?
Let her tell you what works and what doesn't. Start intimacy by holding her and laying close to her the full length of your bodies. Allow her to touch herself and when she starts breathing heavily and moaning, often with her tongue flicking, gently kiss her face and lips.
Allow her to proceed at her own speed. Tantric massage is the requirement here, to channel the sexual energy up through the chakras. Observe the state she is in. Whisper reassurances or repeat a low "Om" sound in her ears, like a bell - deep and ringing. Follow her hands and fingers as she gets higher. The transition will come, for you to eventually take over.
This process cannot be rushed. It takes time and patience and a secure and comfortable place. If you are into meditation, this should be preceded by meditation to clear the minds.
It may lead to full intercourse, or not. If it doesn't, feel happy that you have helped your partner to where she wants to be. This is your role.
Please look at this video, how women can achieve orgasm during childbirth:
