In Praise of Older Women

It has been a while since I have written. Much water has gone under the bridge in the meantime.

My recent experiences have taught me that Shakti is transient. She moves in and out of  women. However, she makes herself discover-able. After losing Shakti in my beloved, I felt bewildered. I cannot recall doing anything different in the relationship; yet, the desire was gone. I tried to rationalise. In the end, I just accepted the situation. We are still very good friends, but she has become omnisexual, seeking her satisfaction in the ocean.

So what happened next?

I happened to meet an older lady. She is in her 80s. I could see from her smile that she was a dangerous woman, but she had all the appearances of being a prim and proper 'school mam'. She was coy and reserved, as one would expect of a recently-widowed woman. She was fit and healthy; trim, slim and upright. More like 60-something than 80-something.

It was clear that there was an attraction. She was insistent on telling me that she was 'too old' and that she had forgotten what to do. Her late husband's illness had precluded sex for a long time. I was invited for lunch and after eating, we sat down on a sofa and began to embrace and kiss. This had the effect of summoning forth Shakti. The result was explosive. Both of us were amazed at the intensity and passion. I was quite afraid of 'breaking' her, but as she does a routine of daily exercises, she is very tough.

Being a thinker,  she wanted us to analyse what was going on. Why, after so many dormant years, could the flames of passion be reignited? Why was I so attracted to her, given our age difference? Why was her sexual organs functioning so well, with lubrication and sensitivity. Why did she want to make love endlessly?

Considering these I answered that it seems that women are conditioned to believe that their sex lives are over after the menopause. Their men have no idea how to keep the juices flowing (literally!). I think women decide that they should quash their libido and take of crochet or flower arranging.

The flames of passion depends on the man; if he is skillful at fanning the embers, then a huge fire will ensue. Unhindered by thoughts of children or job or what anyone else will think of her, if she feels secure and love, a mature octogenarian will 'let go' completely. Combine this with a feeling that it could be the swan song, and you have a very passionate partner.

The age difference? It has no relevance. Yes, signs of ageing are inevitable, but it is not a body who I making love to, it is the soul. The body is just a device to accommodate the tactile world we live in.

Keeping fit and healthy is an important factor. Practicing yoga, for example, keeps the body supple. Sensible nourishment as well. Meditation and living an independent but social life (children, friends, etc) allows a woman to maintain and grow self-worth and self-esteem.

My mature lover is like a teenager in her eagerness and agility. It is highly erotic. Her orgasms are remarkable and she is constantly coming, and is wet (although I have to constantly assure her that it is nothing to be embarrassed about)

We are both fundamentally changed by what has happened. She confides with her daughters and they have said that they are no longer afraid of ageing. I feel that this woman, unless Shakti takes flight again, will be able to maintain her lifestyle and libido until she is well over 100. Sex for her is a therapy and people have commented on how much younger she seems.

The real beauty of the relationship is that it can be kept very private, because in our culture, no one would credit it that two pensioners would be having such wild sex sessions which last for many hours on a daily basis. This privacy is extremely important and the 'school mam' image works as a nice facade.

I wonder how many other women experience this renaissance? It seems that it would depend on their being a supply of men who are over 50 but understand tantra. Those men have to learn to love gently, take time and not be affected by cultural body images.

If their are any senior women in my audience, take heart; their is no such thing as an end of a sex life. It may be re-awoken at any time, given the right stimulation.

If you are around the age of menopause, please be aware. You may well have 60 years of your life left. It is possible to enjoy sex even more that when you were in your reproductive age. It is an incentive to you not to fear getting old. Find a younger man who understands Tantra and let go - let go of the worries and responsibilities. It will transform your life.





 

Trump, Putin, Erdogan Declare War on Women

The "strong men" of the world have declared war on women. Through changes in the law, Trump, Putin and Erdogan are showing their misogyny.  A reaction by the inadequate men of the world who think they have lost their power.

Their values are the antithesis of Tantra. They cannot accept that women are superior beings. Any enlightened man can see this. 

They want to suppress women by rape and violence. Instead of worshiping the Divine Feminine. This is  unacceptable. This signifies the end of humanity. Greed and power chasing fewer and fewer resources. More people in the world dividing up an ever diminishing cake.

I am a man and although I reach inside myself, cannot help but feel despondent. Despondent that women could vote for these monsters. That they can admire these monsters. That they could sleep with the male supporters of these monsters.

As I have said before, if men discovered their real role in this life, they would find bliss. By worshiping the Divine Feminine present in every female.

All my sisters who have gained sexual realization and a Kundalini awakening. Talk to other women, educate them. Do not tolerate ignorance. Do not submit to idiotic men. Do not let money and materialism tempt you. Better to live alone than with a spiritual cretin.

Enlightenment or Ignorance - it is Your Choice.

Enlightenment is an insight into the spiritual. It also means "the full comprehension of a situation". The opposite meaning is ignorance.

If you become enlightened with Tantra, you start to realize that most of humanity is ignorant. Not only in Tantric terms, but just the way we live. 

I feel that humanity today exists in a western-culturally led globalisation.  This has turned many of us into potted plants. Society feeds and  waters us to keep things just so. To be useful to carry out work for others. To keep the status quo.

We think that we can be "happy" by amassing material goods. We focus on time. We worship money, the great mammon. The education system dumbs us down with outcome orientated teaching. We accept that the world is becoming a rougher, less caring place. We focus on "me", the ego.

It could be so different. If we want to move forward in peace, we must think in a new way.

First of all, we have to start with our health. Without our health, we cannot be good lovers. It is hard to give if you are thinking about pain. We eat food that is not real food. To make someone rich, or as government policy. This leads to chronic illness: cancer, diabetes, heart disease, etc.

We have to take responsibility for our health . We can start by proper eating in modest amounts. We have to practice intermittent fasting and occasional calorific restriction.

We have to learn to centering, the single-point of attention. That is not found in your head, it is in your 'Hara', below your navel.

We have to learn correct breathing and how to move.

When we are healthy, we can move to fitness. Mental and physical fitness. Then we can give, engage with our minds and higher consciousness. We learn to do this and later we can learn to fuse with another enlightened human to release the full power of Tantra.

99.9% of people are living in ignorance. They have locked themselves in their intellect, egos and emotions. They are not in their sensuality.

In my opinion, there is one group, a large group, who have the easiest path. These are mothers who have brought their children to adulthood. There we have a dilemma. Because of cultural stereotypes, the women suffer from low self esteem and self worth. What a shame. 

The loving potential of these women can power the world. That potential is only released when the men become enlightened.

So, let me restate my mantra: The role of men on this Earth is to worship the Divine Feminine.  

Apart from being the catalyst to help women reach a higher and higher level of consciousness, they can do a lot. It starts with total respect for women. No molesting, no rape, no putting women down. No equality as feminists would have. Rather an elevation of all women to a status of the Divine Goddess.

That does not mean that men should be patronizing. Being strong and protective at the same time loving and tender is the duty of all men. Providing the means to procreation and supporting mother and child is another. Men must never regard women as property. They must accept the non-permanence of relationships. The latter is hard to achieve. Jealousy, envy and possession are all apart of our material world.  Rejection is hard for the ego to deal with. But we must get rid of the idea of monogamy and possession. It is a poison.  

If you are a woman reading this: Trust your intuition. Realize your sexuality. Look after your health.

If you are a man reading this: Accept that women are on a higher plane in the sentinent hierarchy. Use your sensuality and empathy as a strength. Do not consider it a weakness. Listen to your partner. Your aim is to help bring her to a lasting sensual orgasm and keep her there for as long as possible. You will then sense the energy of the cosmos. This is a reward in itself.

Namaste.

I love this following video.

Why We Should Study Tantra as Individuals from Katrina Bos on Vimeo.

You've Lost That Loving Feeling....When your Tantric Woman loses interest

“You never close your eyes anymore when I kiss your lips

And there's no tenderness like before in your fingertips”

                                                                                -“You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feeling”

I often wondered as a kid, what this song was about. Was it that his woman did not love him anymore? Perhaps she no longer found him attractive? She has another lover? Who knows?

My experience shows a different possibility.

Let us assume that Shakti is not your Tantric lover. Let us say that she is not the Divine Love Goddess. That Shakti reveals herself through a window that your partner has opened.

There are many different scenarios and situations leading to a form of kundalini awakening. The conditions have to be there to allow the two snakes to uncoil themselves. This can be an awareness of the woman. The intellect can be a driver. We men may kid ourselves that we are responsible.

The fact is that a woman can open the window to allow you to experience Shakti, the true Divine Love Goddess. And she can close it again. Just like that.

This can come as a shock. A blow to the ego, if you are still carrying one around. When she is no longer interested in making love. When it appears that she has gone cold on you. A million thoughts can pass through your mind. “What am I doing wrong?”, What happened?”. “Is there somebody else?”.

 Are you doing anything wrong? No, not if you are concentrating on her pleasure. If she is a Tantric lover, she would have told you that you could do better. Is there somebody else? A Tantric lover has to be empathic to allow the window to open, so she would tell you if there was, for sure. But if there is, just hope that he is a better lover than you are, because you do wish her the best. What happened? Several things are possible: Unfortunately, cultural norms affect Tantric women. It may well be that she has been in the negative atmosphere of other women who have a downer on all males. They may persuade her that she ought not to trust men. These women can be the older ones who have never experienced an awakening. Or they could be rabid feminists.

 Another possibility is that your Tantric lover has had a major change in her life. These changes can be the in the form of a lifestyle change, an illness, an emotional shock or the menopause.

You may well find that although you are a good Tantric lover, you suck in other ways! Yet I think that being open and honest with each other would lead her to tell you.

Sometimes it is that your lover cannot tell you what the reason is. Only that she does not want to take part in love making. For no particular reason. That is tough.

My theory is that we as men are invoking Shiva to find Shakti and we make the mistake in assuming that our lover is Shakti. We have to understand that if the conditions exist, your lover will show you Shakti. It is this embodiment that you are making love to. You are creating cosmic energy fusions. Your lover moves to a higher level of consciousness. She is making a path available by connecting with her mind.

So, what to do?

If you are friends with your lover, you need to show understanding. Give her room and time. Perhaps leave her alone completely for a while. Her window may open again – it may not. If it doesn’t, it is sad. This is Shakti in her role as the Great Destroyer. It hurts. You feel devastated. You feel that everything was perfect. That it should last forever. You want to go back in time and do something to avert the present situation.

If you have to move on, understand this. Your lover was never yours. She was the vehicle for Shakti. She opened a window for you. The window closes with this lover. It will open another place.

 “If You Love Someone, Set Them Free. If They Come Back They’re Yours” -Richard Bach

Are Women their own worst enemies?

I have a female friend who was at a get together of other women recently. They had originally met as a group of mothers at their kids' pre-school and now, some 10 years later, they were together again. My friend is a now a single mom, but is sexually self-realized and has decided that she no longer needs marriage as a part of her lifestyle. The other moms were either still married, or had moved on into other relationships. There was a strange reaction when she told about how her life was. There was no reference to her intimate life, mind you. Some of the women that she considered to be friends in the old days shunned her. She was rather taken aback at this but it did not spoil the general good tone of the party. She brought this up with me after a few days and we talked about what may have been going on. One of the things we discussed was that maybe the friends were either jealous or even scared of her. Why jealous? Because her demeanor is one of a woman who is satisfied and happy with herself, and therefore life. She gets what she wants without having to obey the rules of having to "give" herself to a man that she should live with. Perhaps that is what these women truly want without having the self-confidence or self-worth to be able to accomplish it. Scared, because I feel that "conventional" women see a loose, sexually-free woman as a threat. A threat to their ideals of marriage and social conformity and a threat to themselves directly, as they would not like their hubbies to come anywhere near this woman. This is clearly how women are supposed to react; as a part of the game, they are expected to uphold the patriarchal conventions of subservience and possession. A women should "belong" to a man and a man should "belong" to a women. That is marriage, isn't it? It seems to me that the witch hunts of previous times were not instigated by men, rather by women who were jealous and scared of any women who was free, wise and attractive. This attitude was reinforced in Christian lands by the church. Therefore women were demonized if they were not under the cosh of a man and some dreadful crimes were committed against them. We don't burn witches today, although in some cultures, any woman who deviates is punished by stoning to death. In so-called civilized countries, it is still the norm to ostracize free-thinking, free-living women and cast them as sinners and a threat to the institution of marriage and the family. I don't think women, generally, have come very far since the witch-burning times. What a shame. If we are going to move forward or even survive as the human race, we need to get back to appreciating the Divine Feminine in every woman. That means first and foremost that women have to listen to their inner voice and rediscover what was so prominent 10,000 or so years ago. Other women who are on the path should support every effort by their sisters and not feel envious or resentful. Only when all women are aware can they hope to educate men on how to treat women as Divine Love Goddesses.

Sacred Sexuality (by Shrif Swami)

Tantra says: The appeal of sex is because it gives you a moment of egolessness, timelessness, meditation. Because of ego-gratification, sex has become very very superficial, it only scratches the skin. It does not go deep, it has no depth. So many people are worried about premature ejaculation. The reason? They don’t love. If they love, then naturally they can make love for longer periods — the more you are in love, the longer the period will be. For hours you can be in love, because there is no hurry, the ego is not controlling.

In a Tantra coitus you can remain for hours. It is a kind of melting with the woman or with the man, it is a kind of relaxation into each other’s being. And it is meditative, because there is no ego, no thought stirs. And time stops. This is a glimpse of God. Tantra is the natural way to God, the normal way to God. The object is to become so completely instinctual, so mindless, that we merge with ultimate nature — that the woman disappears and becomes a door for the ultimate, the man disappears and becomes a door for the ultimate.

This is the Tantra definition of our sexuality: The return to absolute innocence, absolute oneness. The greatest sexual thrill of all is no search for thrills, but a silent waiting. Utterly relaxed, utterly mindless. One is conscious, conscious only of being conscious. One is consciousness. One is contented, but there is no content to it. And then there is great beauty, great benediction..

Sexual Energy (by Shrif Swami)

Sexual energy is a wastage if it only remains confined to sex, but it becomes a great blessing if it starts transforming its quality: sex not for sex’ sake — use sex as a communion of love. Use sex as a meeting of two souls, not only of two bodies. Use sex as a meditative dance of two persons’ energies. And the dance is far richer when man and woman are dancing together — and sex is the ultimate in dance: two energies meeting, merging, dancing, rejoicing.

But use it as a stepping-stone, as a jumping-board. And when you reach the climax of your sex orgasm, become aware of what is happening, and you will be surprised — time has disappeared, mind has disappeared, ego has disappeared. For a moment there is utter silence. This silence is the real thing!

By Shrif Swami Reposted from Tantric Therapy on Facebook.

The New World Order

Wise up, guys! There is a New World Order on the way!

Women today have found their rightful way to economic independence and that is a fact. It goes and different speeds around the world. In North West Europe, it is a fast development and I am told that that is the situation in East Asia. Women are getting educated and finding power through their careers.

Oh dear, I hear the lament of my brothers; but there is really no need for this. It is a fact that the peacefulness and hence, prosperity, of a nation is proportional to how its women are treated. I take it that we all have an interest in a peaceful world? Good!

So what does this mean to the average Jock? It means that you, Jock, will have to get wise and change your ways if you want any sort of sex life in the future that involves a female partner.

Until recently, us guys had entitlement, which meant that we could do pretty much what we liked with women - screw them, rape them, enslave them, beat them, because the expression of testosterone is violence. No way could women fight back. They were number two, if they were considered anything at all.

That is changing - partly by education and partly through the feminist movement. No, I am not a great fan of the feminist movement, especially when it becomes as fundamentalist as the creed of rabid ayatollahs and gets incorporated into the establishment - "state feminism". I believe that these women have directed so much hate at men, that they have denied their sisters and daughters access to what men are really capable of, if only they had the right guidance.

It should be (but it isn't) plain to see that the world is heading in the wrong direction. We have a corporation that wants to flood the world with cheap, toxic, highly addictive food for the masses. Probably backed by governments. Many people are living decidedly unhealthy morbid lifestyles as a consequence. If you are an obese, diabetes ridden, heart attack victim who has been made ill by all the crap food, you will find it difficult to reach tantric bliss.

"The media purveys a never-ending stream of inane, dumbed down hypnotic garbage that numbs the senses, plus of course Porn – the only means by which the de-sensitised, emotionally crippled consumers can get turned on any more" to quote Eleanor O'Rourke

Take the mantra of competition (the driving force of survival) to its obvious conclusion – a few people stand on the winner’s podium while everybody else loses.

This could all change, starting with the realization that women are divine and to be a real man, you must be a worshiper of women. However, there are many other things that could happen, such as a new paradigm for corporations who set themselves in society instead of believing they are separate from it.

To live a tantric lifestyle, essential for humanity's survival, you have to love yourself, your body and keep both mind and body healthy. By exercise and right diet. The Internet plays an important role, so never allow governments and corporations to control it. Write you own blog, your experiences. You can learn, discover and teach your children to learn about intimate human relations from books, articles, blogs and spiritual videos instead of the plastic, distorted, perverted world of pornography. Distinguish between the erotic and pornography.

Seek out like-minded people. Avoid those who are only in it for the money. Discuss openly, without fear, with everybody. Distinguish between casual, mindless, bonking sex and the sacred love-making between two souls. Use the creativity to solve your life's daily problems. Care for others as you will be cared for. Teach your children and others. Do not evangalise, but be aware of those who are ready to climb out of the dungeons of corporate oppression where they are shackled with the evil of money and materialism. Wellbeing and happiness in who you are counts much more than the love of things. Things are to be used, humans are to be loved, but our world has turned this on its head and what you see is many unhappy, unfulfilled, "wealthy" people.

Your wealth is in your giving, not the accumulated things. That giving starts with love and awareness. The love of nature, the appreciation and thankfulness of everything you experience, the godliness of you and everything and the transmutation of energy by the uniting of the feminine and the masculine in sacred, deep, aware, respectful, love-making.

Be skeptical; listen to the messages: kill the competition, consume more, go for economic growth. Reject these shibboleths and think in terms of enjoy what's around, cultivate relationships, forget concepts of possession and ownership of other people.In being jealous of things and relationships, you are sinking into a black hole. If you love yourself and have the capacity to love others, love will find you. But if you are envious, jealous, obsessive and possessive, unhappiness will follow you around like a shadow

So, hopefully you have now read the above and taken this in. You can go back to your rat-race job and convince yourself you have to do all this to "survive" (which is actually all you are doing), or you can sit on your bottom with a pizza and beer watching some inane reality show because you have nothing else to do having been excluded from the "elite" rat-race society. Neither are optimal, so start today by taking some outdoor exercise. Go swimming. Be aware of all that is around. Appreciate it. Find the best food you can afford. Organic. Start doing yoga and meditation. Clear you r mind and tune up your beautiful body. Seek the immutable truth in everything you appraise. Find like-minded people. Be open and honest to these people. They will be open and honest back. Love with passion and with the aim of giving and pleasing the other on a physical and spiritual level. Live long and lovingly. Give yourself.

A Woman is like a Canvas and her Lover an Artist

I love Metaphors! I was explaining to my partner what it was like to make love to her, bearing in mind that to me she has special qualities, which I will tell you about further down this blog. I told her that she was like a canvas and when I made love to her, it was like painting a picture. I come to think about what you needed to paint a great picture - time, canvas, brushes, paint. Paint! that is a vital ingredient, the raw material, without which it would be impossible to paint at all. My lover supplies a complete palette of bright paints - the colors of her chakras. So as long as I have this paint I can create wonderful images on the canvas. The point here is that those colors have to be available. Unfortunately, many women (and I suppose men) only have black and/or white available, which limits what can be created. Why do most women have very limited and plain colors? Because they have, since youth, had the colors leeched out of them by parents, family, culture, tradition and religion. Or even worse, they have had the palettes deliberately spoiled (mixed together to form a dirty brown) by the same parties. What I mean to say here is that a woman who is open, empathetic and unafraid is easier to love; because she reacts - naturally. She is not scared of where the feelings will take her and is ready to let her brain slide and her mind open up to the vast emptiness where all knowledge resides. Of course, this process relies on her partner understanding the process and being full of trust, because trust=love which gives security. Women can do this themselves to a degree, but half the magic is missing and they cannot fully concentrate. Have you ever tried to tickle yourself? Many, many women are filled with guilt or have been repressed. They once dreamed of being loved and having someone to take those fresh colors and make a fantastic painting. Only the "artist" had no idea, daubing the paint on crudely, even making holes in the canvas occasionally. A huge disappointment for many, leaving the majority to believe that the fault was with them. The doctrines of religion have caused huge damage and you can see that on the streets. Women rarely look happy in public. Because they are fundamentally not - or they are afraid to show happiness in case it becomes a signal for another selfish "artist" to come and mess the paints up to give a monochrome crap-color. Can anything be done to reverse this? Can the paints be separated out? Yes, I believe they can, but it takes a lot of patience and understanding. First, there has to be an atmosphere of trust - trust that the woman is safe under all circumstances and she will not be physically of psychologically hurt. The lover has to be capable of showing his(or her) understanding and skill, without "bragging". It is all in the kiss, and you won't believe how many times I have been called "dangerous" after the first kiss. It takes time, and lots of tender love. It takes dialog and exploration. Many women suffer from a severe lack of self-worth and they have the concepts of Shakti explained and discussed. Masturbation by the woman is encouraged, as this helps her ease into being relaxed and shows her lover how she likes to be touched. Go slowly - I mean real slow - 2-3 hours minimum. Many guys are thinking "whoa!, she has to what?" Why do men have problems with this, that a woman pleasuring herself somehow takes the focus off Mr. Big Dick Ego? You are here to assist and your reward is the love you will get back and, if you believe in Karma, the positive energy that comes your way. There is a fantastic feeling of achievement to watch a woman disappear into a trance of pleasure. If you are very aware, you will see the Kundalini energy creating a fountain from the top of her head and you will feel good. Believe me. If you can control your ejaculation, you can go on for hours, because she can! I would say that the biggest obstacle is approaching the issue from the start with a woman. Remember, many women, it seems, especially those over 50, do not know what an orgasm looks or feels like. But with an open mind and a lot of love, they will and your partner will realize her sexuality. Enjoy!

Abundance

This is a re-post from Bodhisatva. It was very difficult to read, so I have tidied it up. I did this because there is an important message, which needs to be broadcasted. I hope that you don't mind, Bodisatva?

"According to Ayurveda Vihar [lifestyle] and Ahar[ proper food] is necessary for a abundant and healthy life.

Harmony and abundance and superconciuosness or no mind space is required for a happy married life unless the harmony , abundances or superconciouness happens between two people you will search for a new partner.

Unless the abundance and harmony happens you will fight and get bored with your partner. Other things like beauty or education or status are not required for happy married life if harmony and nothingness is happening in relationship the marriage life or love relationship will be happy it will be a celebration and will dance together if harmony happens between two people and it will last long.

We are not whole and complete and that's why we are searching for a lover or partner to become complete and divine. Our partners help us to realise our divinity.

Male and female energy or yin or yang melts in to each other and we become whole and divine. According to yoga and Ayurveda we have seven chakras in our body.

In ordinary sexual relationship only some chakras meet between couples and harmony and superconciousnesss does not happen. In India, Hindus and tribes do some ritual before marriage . If you do these rituals. there is possibility of happening of love , harmony and superconciousness between two lovers or husband and wife. These are very scientific rituals .

In some tribes 15 days before the marriage the bridegroom and bride are massaged with turmeric and sandalwood paste the reason is that turmeric and sandal wood helps in opening of chakras in body sandal helps with third eye chakra and turmeric helps in opening solar plexus chakra the seat of our ego. They use gold jewellery and flower garland during the marriage ceremony, the reason is that flowers helps in opening the chakras or energy vortexes and moving the energy. Use of flowers in bach flower remedies everybody knows. Bach flower therapy uses flowers for healing purpose .

Buddha field flower essences uses flowers for opening the chakras. Flowers like hibiscus, rose are aphrodisiac, that is why lovers gives rose flowers to their beloved. also Indians use gold jewellery in marriage as gold is superconductor of energy . It helps in opening of kundalini and chakras and brings harmony and abundance. It brings vitality and it is used in ayurvedic medicines as a aphrodisiac . Gold is used in homeopathy as medicine for sexual diseases as a remedy name ”aurum met” .Gold is very useful in healing wounds from broken relationship ,sorrow and in jealousy and possesivness. It helps in abundance and in healing.

In India during marriage the bridegroom wears a cap or a pagri . This cap helps in listening of nada or sound of aum . As you go deep in love you start listening the sound of aum from your ears if you listen to this sound with a pagri or with a ear plug you will achieve nothingness as the sound of aum is a bridge between spiritual and material world. Thats why Sikh people in india wears a turban . The sound of aum is indicating that you are reaching near your divinity. During marriage tribes and Hindus go around seven round the fire it means meeting of seven chakras and they promise each other during ceremony to be together till the energy reaches to seventh chakra or superconciousness and they put a dot or bindi which is sindoor or kumkum [it is a chemical substance mercuric oxide which helps in opening the chakras]. 

Abundance means you are not bored with your partners but you are happy and content your male and female energy is in balance. if you see the walls of khajuraho Tantra temples they are revealing so many secret of abundance and harmony. They do so many ritual and techniques to attend a happy and satisfied married life. Tantra temples were used to perform these rituals. For more information regarding Tantra temple visit my tribe ”Tantra temple” @tribe .net.

A marriage is not only a marriage for a tribe in India. They gather together for ceremonies at least 15 days before the marriage and this ceremony becomes a real celebration for everybody. They enjoy food for physical abundance and they dance for celebration. Use of pan or bettle leaf with silver foil and saffron brings abundance. there is beautiful stories about krishna and radha with pan, krishna eats pan or bettle leaf and when the leaf turns in to a red paste after chewing the pan krishna licks the lips of radha and radha sucks this paste from his mouth through his lips .

Krishna and radha goes to different jungles for raasleela . This jungle or van is full of seasonal fruits and honey and delicacies they sing and dance and celebrate this beautiful life. In indian krishna temple in Nathdwara in Rajasthan they serve pan after the serving the 56 bhog to Krishna. 56 bhog is 56 tyes of indian food delicacies. Now these days a himalayan drug company uses pan and kum kum in its aphrodisiac medicine tentex forte. Physical abundance comes with eating these 56 type of delicacies.

Indians eat with hands the reason is that your fingers also becomes sensual after opening the heart chakra. These recipes is cooked in pure ghee or in indian butter.when you are not abundant your sexuality is localised to first chakra with jealousy and possessions. It is sexuality but not sensuality. Sensuality comes after opening of heart chakra. When heart chakra opens then you don't feel inadequate in love making and you share your love without any attachment . You have so much love to give that you share without any condition or relationship without asking anything in return.

Indians use sitopaladi churna for abundance. This churna is made of bamboo which is high in silica mineral. If there is less silica in body you are malenutritioned. silica helps in digestion and absorbing the mineral and vitamins from food. They use cowry mala for psychic protection as you become very vulenarable in deep love. Cowry is also full of calcium. Calcium is very useful in opening the heart chakra. There are so many products available. Then question comes what is good or what is bad. The answer is the products which makes you aware alert and abundant is good and which makes you unaware , unconscious and intoxicated is bad. 

I am presenting some Indian herbs and products which are used in these ceremonies .For an indian tribe, marriage is celebration and death is also a celebration. Totality is key of happy life. totality means not only two bodies rubbing to each other but it should be meeting of heart and mind and body .In this totality surrender will happen . I mean Tantra will happen [Tantra is a happening but not a performance - if your heart is open and if you are vulnerable and receptive Tantra will happen itself]. But our social conditioning, fears and control do not allow Tantra to happen.

We don't need kamasutra vatsayanas asanas for Tantra . These asanas are performance which comes from mind and Tantra can not happen only with mind]. That is why meditations, rituals needed to bring the totality. Once you are total in love making you get possessed with sex energy and in this possession all kamasutra asanas and yoga asanas and mudras happen automatically during the love making.[ if you are total in love making then you don't need to go to a yoga class either.... Tantra is a couple yoga where your partner works as a catalyst so all the asanas happens to both partners and if you are aware then you can watch your body doing asanas.
 
Our lover takes us to space of aloneness which is a space full of joy and celebration. but if totality is not there in the relationship then it becomes a loneliness. Aloness is totally different from loneliness, it is a space of joy. In aloneness you are happy with your own company, but in loneliness you search for somebody to fill your emptiness . If Tantra happens in relationship then it creates a space of aloneness ,joy and creativity and if the totality is not there in relationship then it creates loneliness and emptiness and isolation.
 
Now these days in the name of Tantra and art of love making many people doing many workshops and sessions and classes they release their sexual suppressions in the name of Tantra . It's not Tantra - it is true that when you release your sexual suppression you feel relaxed and unburdened. But it is not Tantra. It is not real love making. 

My own understanding about Tantra is that Tantra is a happening. Tantra happens from the space of no mind.it is not a effort its a happening it happens when you get possessed with sex energy, and once Tantra happens between couples it becomes celebration ,you dance with happiness and you feel gratefull to each other. Unless the dance , celebration and gratefullness happens in relationship it is not real love. When you do a kamasutra exercise or try to perform in sex its not Tantra, because all the doing comes from mind and Tantra is a happening which happens when you are in space of no mind or you get possessed with sex energy. You are not doing any effort or you are not doing any technique you are just allowing or surrendering to sex energy.
 
Due to fear, morality and conditionings we do not allow ourselves to get possessed or surrender to our sex energy. To attend space of no mind all the rituals and techniques of meditation are needed, but what I feel is that in the West, Tantra has become a good business with selling dildos, cheap Tantra books written by unexperienced Tantra teachers,kamasutra techniques and which has nothing to do with Tantra . If you surrender to sex energy all kamasutra postures will happen themselves and you do not need dildos, Tantra teachers and cheap materials to learn Tantra. You only need to learn how to come out of our conditionings, control and morality.

Any good meditation [specially Oshos active meditation techniques] iare very help full in attaining ”no mind ”space. Tantra is meeting of energies and ones you get possessed with the divine energy, Tantra happens itself then who cares about learning about ”p” spot or ”g” spot. because body has its own natural instinct to find out the spots or do a posture . Its all mind.
 
There are two types of love: First is biological love, it is our animal instinct. You get attracted to somebody due to hormones, and these hormones lasts for 3 years. Then you start getting bored with your partner. It is just lust. The second type of love happens when you meet at soul level after opening of chakras in body - when you meditate, do rituals and use aphrodisiac herbs these rituals and herbs helps in opening in chakras of body. It helps in happening of love of soul level, and during these rituals, herbs help in attaining ,abundance, saiti harmony,and superconciousness.

These days so many tantric classes are happening for teaching art of love making, but Tantra needs a pure heart so energy can flow between two person but not a teacher with his/her intellectual mind. Love is the basic requirement for happening of Tantra, but i do not think Tantra teachers are always feeling love for their clients - they just teach without love for sake of teaching or for money. If two people are in deep love Tantra will happen. 

People can relive their sexual suppressions in Tantra classes in the name of Tantra or art of love making but its not Tantra.
 
In India, Tantra, or the art of love making has its own tradition. Its spiritual and divine. In India, people do not do Tantra with aggressive minds. Tantra needs a feminine surrendering mind. In this surrender, Tantra happens - that is why a Hindu woman touches the feet of her husband- she surrenders to her husband so the circle is completed. But in the West woman is becoming very competitive with man and that is why there are many divorces and broken relationships.

This competitive attitude makes her solar plexus very strong. Solar plexus is the seat of ego. With a strong ego, love never happens. Surrender never happens. Two egos always fight. A man should be a man and a woman should be a complete woman and there will be attraction due to polarity. The energy always moves between opposite poles . That is why learning of Tantra or art of love making is needed, so energy can move to all the seven chakras freely and enlightenment and superconciousness can be attend. Surrender and totality is the key of Tantra. Women in the West are now full of intellectual knowledge or or full of mind, and this borrowed knowledge or education has made her solar plexus very strong. Tantra need a innocent heart to happen. My understanding is that once the energy crosses the solar plexus in love a deep harmony happens due to opening of the heart and all the argument and fights stops. Once the harmony happens then lovers do not even talk - they understand each other without talking.

You can not solve your relationship problems by talking or by argument;unless harmony happens between two people there will be arguments and fighting. The more the borrowed intellectual knowledge the more the fights and conflicts.  Surrender means totality in relationship. Not only two bodies rubbing to each other but it should be meeting of heart and mind and body that is the meaning of yoga joining the body mind and soul.

I have found that doing meditations, Tantra and ritual and using aphrodisiac herbs and products helps in bringing abundance and contentment in relationship. There are so many products, herbs and food and medicine then the question is what to eat for a abundant and happy married life? Here are some natural products and herbs which can be used as a aphrodisiac as well as for healing purpose also. These herbs and products is used by Indian tribes and Indian people. Here in this tribe you can also get consultation and counseling by our team of Ayurvedic doctor and experts regarding these products . You can also ask question and advise regarding your sexual and relationship problems by sending a email. classes and sessions on Tantra also available for more information visit Bodisatva's tribe ”Tantra temple” and the tribe ”tantric matrimony” and ”kamasutra products”@www.tribe.net."

It's all about trust

Fellas!

Do you know how a woman lets go? She does it when she feels really comfortable and secure. She needs to trust the man she is with. Because women have been so abused and suppressed for thousands of years, it has become apart of the genetic inheritance not to trust a man.

Who can blame them? Men treat women as objects, as animals that are to be hunted and tamed, to obey and submit to the will of our "superiority". Women get hurt by men all the time. I am not suggesting that all women are angels, but the ones who act psychopathically are often trying to meet men on their own ground.

Women are amazing, because they can, through their sexuality, reach a higher level of consciousness. We men can also reach a higher level of consciousness, but often we have to choose the meditative route. But a part of the worshiping of the divine is to realize the divine nature of the sexual energy present in a woman, namely the kundulani energy in her ovaries.

Because of the suppression, many women are not even aware of this energy in their own bodies, or because of the guilt attached to experiencing sexual pleasure, are scared to explore this path.

Some women mistakenly, in my opinion, used sex toys - inanimate articles, to stimulate themselves further than they can stimulate themselves. Because you have probably noticed that it is very hard to tickle yourself.

By gaining the real trust of a woman, it is possible to allow her to move into a zone of ecstacy, where by experiencing orgasmic plateaus, over a period of time, move ever higher and away from this realm. It is a beautiful thing to experience and it is mans' true role on Earth.

When I say trust, I don't mean to try and fool your partner. This trust takes time to build up and if it is not real, any woman will see right through it. Do not rush it. It takes empathy and sympathy, listening and kind gestures. Show her that you will never harm her.

You will know when she trusts you when you ask her to masturbate in front of you.

Now from a man's point of view, this can be a difficult thing to ask; many men have the idea that when a woman masturbates, it is a direct insult to his sexual prowess. That she is thinking about someone else. This is horribly selfish thinking. Just because many men jerk off with an image of a woman of their choice does not mean that women do the same! No, women are more sophisticated that that! She is pleasuring herself, touching and caressing the parts that she herself would like her lover to pleasure - if she could trust him that far.

From a woman's point of view, this can be extremely embarrassing, especially if she has been brought up to believe that masturbation is evil. Up to a few years ago, women would not admit to masturbation, whereas 98% of men did. (I think it was Alfred Kinsey who said the other 2% were liars!). Now, women admit in confidential surveys that they do. Why should it be any different from men to women? It is actually a lot easier for a woman to conceal, because a man has dispose of the sperm on ejaculation and he can only do it so may times in a day.

But is is still taboo. So a woman has to trust - implicitly.

What is the point, here? Women have different ways of masturbation, but essentially it goes from stimulation of the skin, to the breasts, the thighs and then the clitoris. Many do not insert their fingers into their vaginas. As a man, your initial task is to observe, silently. Do nothing. Just watch and see what happens. Take note of how long it takes. If your partner is comfortable (and this may take some days), she will be able to get to orgasm. You may ask her what pleases her most and she may let you try to replicate it. Real gentleness is required. If you don't know what I mean, think about women grabbing your cock - hurts sometimes, doesn't it?

Let her tell you what works and what doesn't. Start intimacy by holding her and laying close to her the full length of your bodies. Allow her to touch herself and when she starts breathing heavily and moaning, often with her tongue flicking, gently kiss her face and lips.

Allow her to proceed at her own speed. Tantric massage is the requirement here, to channel the sexual energy up through the chakras. Observe the state she is in. Whisper reassurances or repeat a low "Om" sound in her ears, like a bell - deep and ringing. Follow her hands and fingers as she gets higher. The transition will come, for you to eventually take over.

This process cannot be rushed. It takes time and patience and a secure and comfortable place. If you are into meditation, this should be preceded by meditation to clear the minds.

It may lead to full intercourse, or not. If it doesn't, feel happy that you have helped your partner to where she wants to be. This is your role.

Please look at this video, how women can achieve orgasm during childbirth:

10 ways to prepare for Tantric Sex

1. Get fit. One of the worst aspects of modern life is that there are far too many obese and unfit people around. That is so sad, because in my opinion, one cannot really reach the levels of subconsciousness unless you have a healthy body. To experience deep sensuous feelings, you have to be aware of your body, because that is the channel that you are using in tantric love making. I believe that many people overeat because they have little spiritual sexuality in their lives. It is possible to get fit by tantric sex! 
2. Swim. When the secrets of tantra were being written down, I doubt that swimming was a form of exercise practiced by many. Now we have good facilities for swimming and I am sure that if swimming pools were around 2,500 years ago, swimming would have been an integral part of yoga. Because swimming is total body exercise and when you are in the rhythm of swimming, you can meditate. Additionally, when you are in a pool of like-minded people, you share a spirituality with them.
3. Shun drugs and alcohol. You don't need them. No drugs can emulate the real present moment awareness of tantric love making. They will slow you down and you will become a slave to them.
4. Eat well. Heavy foods are not conducive to love making and farting and belching will not enhance the experience. Eat light meals regularly, with lots of fruits and vegetables, preferably plucked fresh from the tree as they are full of pranic, or life-force, energy.
5. Practice Yoga. Yoga is an amazing exercise as it helps get you fit, opens channels in your body to cultivate sexual energy and allows you to meditate better. Do yoga with your partner as a prelude to tantric sex.
6. Meditate. Meditate before and after tantric sex, using the love that you have for your tantric partner as the object of your meditation. Let the previous experience arise in your mind and thank your partner for  the joy it brought.
7. Time. Give yourself  plenty of time and be spontaneous. You cannot plan a time for tantric sex, but rather look for the opportunity by performing acts of love constantly. Do not rush. Remember that just looking into your partner's eyes is making love.
8. Mutual Respect. You must have mutual respect for each other. You both come to this sacred act as equals, like an indenture that has to fit together to be valid.
9. Place. The place where you make tantric love is a temple, a place where you worship each other, finding the Shiva and Shakti in each other. Make sure that the environment is calm and inviting, a safe place where you won't be disturbed or distracted.
10. Symbols. Use symbols of your sacred union to remind you of why you are together. Use oils or incense burners to create the ambiance. 

Most of the above would seem obvious, but few couples give themselves the optimal conditions to reach a higher level of consciousness. Many will tick the boxes and say that they already do that, but just think about it.Are you as fit as you could be? Are you eating the right diet? Do you give yourself the time to reach deeper every time you make love?

Think about it. Namaste.

Time to get political about Tantra?

I watched an interesting video by David Wilcock. He says that 2012 is an important year, where humanity will make it or break it. It is a date highlighted by the Mayan and Egyptian calenders. It is the dawn of the Age of Aquarius.

I look around me and see what is happening. It is a fact that many more people have the same thoughts and feelings as I do. This is a factor of the search for spirituality by the Baby Boomers and the post-war European generation. We have the resources to be forward thinking. We have seen a sexual revolution, the emancipation of women, birth control, liberalism. We want more.

The feminist movement has been very aggressive in asserting the rights of women - perhaps too aggressive, because they have not carried all the women forward. The hard core despise men. Others know that they need something from men, but cannot define it, leaving "soft" men bewildered and "hard" men even more macho than before.

What should have happened is that women recognised their true sexuality and then educated the men on exactly what they wanted. Then the men willing to learn would have been able to do what men are good at, namely worshiping their women through their sexuality, or they would have literally died out.

To a degree this is happening, I agree. But it is happening in pockets - the traditional areas of liberal thinking, such as Hawaii, California and Northern Europe. Just a small fraction of the world.

We are faced with a fork in the path; The two scenarios are as follows:

1) The dark forces take over. By religious fundamentalism, chauvinism again comes to the fore and men are "empowered" to treat women as farm animals, as happens in many parts of the world. The lack of females in India and China causes men to dominate merely by being in the majority. In North America, Europe and Australasia, more interference in peoples' private lives "in the interests of your security", becomes a method of control. Sex becomes a purely commercial consumerist function, like drinking and eating are now. You can have as much as you like as long as you are paying someone for the privilege. Pig out, like people do on fast food and sugary drinks, with fast sex.

2) We do, indeed, enter, the Age of Aquarius, where women universally understand that they are liberated through their own sexuality and that they can reach a higher level of consciousness with a lover that understands love. Loving and sex begins with a smile and develops to a deep, sacred relationship between adults, regardless of age, cultural background or skin color. People trust each other and the universal law of Karma is embraced as The Law.  We learn that we are all gods and that together we understand that we are Nature and therefore will do all to protect our lineage.

So, sisters, it is up to you. You must lead this revolution. Learn to love yourself and bury generations of inherited low self-esteem. Find a Dakini or a Tantrika and know what it can be really like and then find a partner who can help you transcend.

Many women around the world need to be shaken out of the shackles they find themselves in - whether by bullying men, intolerant religion, children from a very early age or the disease of consumerism.

I am an optimist: I prefer the Age of Aquarius outcome :-)

Zombies and Rogues

It is amazing how kids are totally involved in World of Warcraft. It panders to their "blue" meme development. Their are zombies, elves, gnomes, rogues, wizards, etc. It seems to me types of characters are reflected in real life.

In my experience, most people are zombies.Those who have not had their sexual/spiritual awakening are the living dead. You can see it in their eyes, on their faces, the way they walk. Unless, of course, everyone is acting - putting up a facade - but I doubt that. There is too much in the world's cultures to conspire against real life.

Others are rogues. Mainly men, who live on a constant overdose of testosterone. They see sex as something entirely and utterly for their own satisfaction and as a tool of power over "weaker" beings - mainly women, but in the worst case, children.

This is a totally sad situation. It makes being in public places a very depressing experience. People are scared - scared of contact, scared of risking showing what they know is inside them, scared of having bad experiences, scared of their sexuality.

So, many (mainly women) suppress it, and others (men) flaunt it in a vile way. Such is it, that many women in the world, instead of going outside with the prospect of meeting a partner who is going to give them the greatest satisfaction in their lives, go out with the fear of being accosted by "rogues", or even worse, being raped by a stupid, egotistical, testosterone-driven man.

And there is the suppression: I perform sports massage to people who have muscular pain. I can feel the level of sexual awareness in people, but being bound by ethical standards, do nothing to take advantage of it. But the difference is astounding: Even in healthy people, there is often no reaction to sensuous touch. This can be for two reasons: one, that the reaction is being suppressed (there and then), or the "circuit is dead", because of suppression as a part of the culture or background of the person. There is also the massive taboo nowadays of being touched at all.

When the clients are so relaxed under massage, it is hard to believe that they are actively suppressing their reactions. So, one may assumed, albeit dogmatically, that these people do not have the sexual awareness that could be considered natural.

But some do. Only a small percentage. Perhaps 1%. This corresponds to Ken Wilber's estimate of the people (in North America and Europe) in the yellow/turquoise memes (holonic). Is that a correlation? Or am I saying that it is the same people who are in both groups.

Does this mean that to make the sexual/spiritual connection, you have to have the necessary experience and have developed through the memes? Perhaps.

The fact is, that as human beings, we all have the potential to realize the Shiva and Shakti inside us. So, why don't we? Because contemporary life conspires against this. Consumerism has totally taken over. The message is that you have to get your pleasure from something you pay for, such as eating and drinking, and pornographic sex. Made cheap enough for everyone to indulge, of course, but the results are plain and obvious: Massive numbers of overweight people who are so out of touch with their bodies, they cannot possibly indulge in tantric lovemaking. Alcoholics and drug takers, seeking a thrill, which they could easily get from spiritual pursuits such as meditation and tantra. Smoking, which seems to create a false meditative state. Sex, so that women operate sexually on the same level as testosterone-filled males, looking for "performance" and sexual variations and deviations. Flitting from partner to partner and still having that empty feeling after all.

This is mainly in Western societies, but all these facets are being adopted in Asia and elsewhere, because it is being sold as "normal". Meanwhile, spirituality, especially sexual spirituality is considered "weird", or is mistaken as lust and promiscuity. And it certainly can be abused (see my earlier posts). It is strange that social media can flourish, showing the need for personal relationships, but people shun physical contact.

There are some brave people out there. Mainly women, who want to spread the word and educate men and women in the art of sexual spirituality. The real Tantrikas and Dakinis put themselves at risk from rogues and many are good at converting the rogues into something useful.

There are many women who have lived and experienced enough to start making the connection. They have had children, been slave to a man for much of their lives and connect with their own masculine sides. They have to really fight to break out of cultural and religious prisons. They go through a lot of pain and self-doubt, often having to regain their self-worth. They have to overcome their experience of men and bury the prejudice that most men are useless idiots (they are!). They are vulnerable to so -called "gurus", who will lead them to retreats in Romania or India , where they are emotionally raped. In finding new relationships, they have to run the gauntlet of men who want them to perform some form of sexual kinkiness to be accepted.

There are some brave men as well.

I wish that there were less zombies and rogues around. I wish that religions stopped oppressing women. I wish that women could start to live. What is needed is more women to take the path and instead of making enemies of men, as some aspects of the Feminist movement have done, start to educate the men. If women know what they really want, they should be able to teach men that. Soft men are OK, but girls, don't psychologically castrate the men. You love the strength of a man and the security it gives.

So, there we have the state of the world. I cannot speak about the non-Western world, but I doubt that in Asia, there are that many enlightened women. Probably not in the Arab countries. In Africa, maybe. But women have a very rough deal in most of Africa. If we take one-half percent of the grown women in Western societies, we are talking of perhaps 20 million women who have realized the purpose of their lives beyond procreation and in some cases, career. There are some 3 billion women who need to be shown, and this is where the Feminist movement should concentrate its efforts.

The Dark Forces of fundamentalism are at large. Women are not being liberated. Chauvinism is on the way back in. As a man, I have learned that women are to be worshiped, but it is oh, so easy for men to revert to being bullies and treating women as farmyard animals. Even in Western societies. Beware of this.

Deep love and satisfaction is possible for every woman. Reaching a higher level of consciousness (super consciousness) is realistic. "Going solo" (masturbation) is a move in the right direction, but the intimacy and ying-yang effect of an empathic partner will allow for the attainment of higher levels.

And brother: You rogue. I know you, I have been there myself. For many years I treated women as objects and  subjects of material deviations. External. Apart. Who cares what she thought, as long as she looked good and I could boast of my prowess. Who cared about the concerns of a mere woman!

This is the message to my brothers: Learn Tantra or Tao. Start to understand that the greatest thrill is to help a woman achieve orgasm. Not "give her an orgasm". She can only give herself an orgasm. But when she is in that trance-like state, you are really loving her. You are fulfilling the conditions for something sacred and magic. If you are good at it, you will be able to help develop her skills. She has a lot of prejudice to overcome.

Tenderness and gentleness are the keywords.

Do it. You will never regret and by doing it, you will make the world a better place.

Sex and Spirituality

A friend of mine had written a blog which talked about sex and spirituality. He made a mention of this blog in social media and one of his female friends commented: "You can't be sexual and spiritual at the same time?". Kind of a statement and question at the same time, which appears to me that she was confused or naive.


The whole point is that sexuality and spirituality are the same. Especially for women. The unfortunate, nay, tragic part is that the vast majority of women do not seem to appreciate this.


Ken Wilber, whom I greatly respect as a thinker, refers to "memes" and the development that individuals and societies have to go through to reach a level of spirituality. The sexual development clearly takes the same path. So it does not surprise me that the vast majority are not "there" yet. It is in the interests of the lower hierarchical memes to hold people away from the realization that sex and spirituality are inextricably linked. 


But like with everything else, people reason and by reasoning and thinking, get to understand more. The ironic thing about sex is that people often make that realization when they are not physically able to do anything about it, because they have gotten old and their bodies begin to break down. Which could have been delayed if they had listened more to their bodies and explored their minds.


Women have the wonderful opportunity of reaching a higher level of conciousness through their bodies. A woman's body is an amazing total sexual organ and by cultivating the sexual energy, can transform it into their minds. Unfortunately for the majority of us men, we have to sit and stare at a wall to achieve the same, by meditation.



Speaking as a man and an observer, I think the majority of women know this. They explore there bodies at an early age, but then, through guilt or approbation, are told that this is "unhealthy". A new study reveals 92% of women regularly take time out to masturbate, a huge jump from the findings of previous studies (74% in 1979 and 62% in 1953). We are heading in the right direction, for sure.


But many women stop here, because men cannot come to terms with this, or lesbianism. Men think that a women who rejects "them" as a "lover" (sic) is some kind of traitor. Women know this, so rarely admit to a man that they masturbate.


However, getting the confidence of a woman to admit this and even better, getting into a relaxed position to show you, as a partner, what she does and how she best stimulate herself can help her get to the higher levels. Why? I could guess that in pre-historic times, a woman knew she was vulnerable when she was in the "zone", therefore having a man to protect her was important. I think this is still valid today, and the appeal of a strong, protective but sensitive man is very important to women.


In any case, the intimacy of a man and the sharing of the experience will help the woman reach, by stages, a higher spiritual level. Here, the man should worship his Shakti woman, whispering encouragement into her ears, caressing her, stroking her body, kissing her gently while she does what she does best. It is being there without getting involved. Guys, forget your egos, forget the self-interest and concentrate on assisting your love partner to ecstasy and bliss. 


This ego-lessness will give you a wonderful feeling of giving and while she is on this high level, or plateau, and stops for a while, she will probably want you to penetrate her, gently. This will lead to the most amazing love making.


She will learn that sex and spirituality are the same thing and will thank you for helping her confirm this. Thank her, for letting you help her make this connection and kneel, or sit cross-legged in front of each other and bow in Namaste.





Sexuality = Spirituality

Tantric Goddesses

I constantly try to learn more - from people and books, web sites, YouTube, etc. The most important source of my knowledge has been my Divine Love Goddess, whose realization and awakening of her sexuality was accompanied by my practicing what I had learned. It has been a wonderful journey so far. She is open. She knows that she has to fight her cultural and religious upbringing to bring to the front the things she knew as a woman.

It may sound naive, but I never thought that I would find a woman who had a Shakti nature. But all women have a Shakti nature. Our "modern" society and the efforts of men over milenia has buried all this to a very deep level. It takes a woman who is brave and open to awaken the serpent within. It also takes a man who has taken the time to study and has broken down his testosterone-driven ego to allow a woman to bring it out.

Some women have found out through self-discovery and believe that no man can ever create the intimacy required. Others seek other women, who understand the subtleties of Shakti nature.

The Internet is populated with many women, claiming to be "Tantra Goddesses", ready to show men, or couples, the Secrets of Tantra. Some are well meaning, but I am reminded of what the Buddhist Master Lhi Chi said "If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him" . So are solicitations on the Internet (through many Facebook pages) just thinly-veiled prostitutes?

I would say that to have any success with Tantra, love has to be involved. You have to love yourself and love the woman, her body, mind, spirit and womb. Can this be done in a "session". If the Goddess is not offering sex, but her wisdom, then it is perfectly acceptable. But beware - because there seems to be a thin line between spiritual sexuality and promiscuous sex and for men, the latter can be a temptation, a short cut to carnal pleasure. That is not what it is about.


I am sure that many of the women (and men) offering their services are doing a good and worthy job, but it must be difficult to distance oneself from the "client", at the same time imparting deep, intimate knowledge.


In the US, it seems that the society is big and spacious enough to accept that tantra teachers can exist. I am sorry to say that in Europe, it is not so: there are still too many taboos, and an attitude that a sexually-aware woman is a "witch". An enlightened man over the age of 45 is a "dirty old man".


So how does the message get across? With difficulty. But one thing is for sure. The future of humanity requires a turnaround where men learn to worship women. Every man and every woman has the divinity within. Women must listen to there instincts and men must be open to learn. Believe me, it is worth it.

Female sexual energy - can you handle it, guys?

Female sexual energy is a very powerful thing. If you have taught or she has learnt the Ovarian Draw or kundalini methods, she will have stored sexual energy in her brain, ready to be discharged.

Brother, do not underestimate the power of this; when released, it can literally suck the life out of you, if you don't know what you are doing.

From your partners viewpoint, a full discharge of this energy, once set in motion, is necessary, because anything short of this will leave her feeling empty and unfulfilled. And that is not a pleasant way to leave a woman.

You will be amazed, even shocked, at the force in which this energy manifests itself, and I advise you to take it nice and slowly. Although you will be tempted, and she will want you to 'take her', resist the temptation. Use your tongue to build your own sexual energy - kissing, sucking, licking. Always be aware of her state and show the tenderness and love that you have for her.

She will build slowly and will come to orgasm, but it does not stop there. You will be able to build on the last orgasm, each cycle taking 10-20 minutes, and at each stage she will get higher and higher.

If it gets too 'hot' for you (both), relax in the Yab-Yum position, where you just embrace. Remember that female sexual energy is cool, as opposed to your own hot energy.

When you feel ready, and she does too, then you can penetrate. Make sure you have been practicing the Big Draw before your sacred love-making, because you will both experience a whole body orgasm.

Enjoy

Dancing Tango

Tango is an amazing dance. Intricate, sesuous, passionate.

It takes something to learn to dance tango. Dancing is like making love. In fact, dancing is making love. It is a wonderful way to build up sexual energy in a woman. The swaying movements, the touch, the look.

A woman aware of her sexuality has the possibility to constantly grow. Like peeling back layers of an onion, there is always more to come. The intensity of her desires will allow her to get to the higher level. If she will open up, and fully experience what her feelings tell her.

As a man, you can give her the framework and the security to do this. By being with her at each new level. Talking her experience through, reassuring her when she feels that there is no logic, that she has lost control and is perhaps afraid that the sesuality can no longer be controlled.

The point is, that she will need a partner who is aware of this and how far she is. She will find that trying to take a sexual partner who is not on her level will be like dancing tango with someone who does not know the steps, or has no rythym. And that would not do at all - an empty, unfulfilled feeling.

Be her dancing partner. Learn the steps, so that you can flow and the dance becomes the basis for reaching something higher. Take the time to understand the processes that your partner is experiencing and attain pleasure from seeing her fly.

In whose interest is it?

I often wonder about drugs; The 'problem' could easily be taken care of; for example, by buying up the opium production in Afghanistan and other places at 'commercial' rates and convert it to morphine, so that people in great pain with terminal illnesses may die a dignified death. But it is in somebody's interest to keep the drug trade going. It is so lucrative, that could it be perhaps all government leaders are corrupted or compromised?

But what about making love? What is the problem? Why is it still heavily engrained in many people that sex is something 'dirty', to be guilty about? We are talking about the most beautiful, sacred act, that people can be engaged in. An act that is peaceful, in harmony with nature and the needs of our souls.

Poeple go around in their lives in the full knowledge that there is something missing in their lives, and they often use materialism as a substitute. This clearly satisfies those who want to sell us products, because by creating this false need, they can watch their profits increase. It instils samsara on us. It leaves us with an empty feeling. We get short term pleasure from 'things', all the while knowing that there is a deeper meaning to it all.

Organised religion has a lot to answer for; yes, there is the consideration of women left to bring up children single-handed, which is far from ideal. In this day and age, with the range of contraceptives available, this should never be a problem. But whole populations are held back from knowledge of contraception, and the result is plain to see; the world is becoming horribly overpopulated.

In advocating making love as a way to enlightenment, I am also saying to all men; take responsibility. You are not the one who becomes pregnant, but you willl be the one to have to pay. So unless you have both consented to wanting a baby, a real love child, make sure that you always wear a condom. It does not detract from the experience at all, and will also help avoid the spreading of diseases. The company Durex make a very good condom, the Featherlite, and it feels almost as if it is not there.

So back to the question; In whose interest is it?

I believe that in ancient times, women were at the centre of society. Their fertility related to the fertility experienced with plants and other animals, and these 'Gaia' women chose the strongest, fittest men to be lovers. Given that there are more men born than women, there was a surplus of weak, but intellectual men. These men sought, through establishing religion, to suppress women. Creating stories of how 'evil' women were, they succeeded and to this day in many religions, women are suppressed and oppressed. So that men can exercise power. Impotent men. Ignorant men.

However, it goes deeper that that. There are such taboos, concerned with marriage, homosexuality, inter-racial relations, inter-religious relationships, age differences, the concept of older people having sexual relations, the notion that women beyond the menopause cannot reach the same levels.

There is the extreme; take the sad case of the Chechnyan President, Ramzan Kadyrov, who thinks that is fine to fire paintball guns at women who do not wear veils. I simply do not understand how women find themselves in these societies. It can only be that they are so suppressed that they do not realise what is being done to them.

I see so many sad people, especially sad women. Men seem to find satisfaction in their domination, their power, but even so I see many very sad men. People who are just existing, wondering why they have been put here on earth. They have absolutely no contact with their souls and are literally shadows. This must be where those who wish to exercise power want them: religions, capitalists, dictators, governments. By creating conditions for samsara, capitalists manage to sell their goods and find workers ready to sell themselves and their labour in the cause of materialism.

I want these people to wake up, but that awakening must come from within. There must be a revolution or the human race will cease to exist within a few generations.

Women: Question the culture and traditions that hold you firmly in your place. Discover your sexuality and use it to reach a higher level of conciousness. Teach your daughters, that sex is sacred - sex is natural and the natural state is to be in ecstacy. It is not to get 'bonked' as many times as you can by as many men as possible. With real love-making, there is nothing to be ashamed of, no punishments to be meted out. No guilt, because it is your body and your mind for you to decide exactly want you want to do with it.

Men: Give up the notion that women are to be hunted and brought to submission like animals. Women are the other half of the human race, but they have have special properties that unfortunately we cannot experience. Well, we can, if we practice yoga. Remember that women are to be respected and that your role in life is to help bring women to eventual enlightenment, which they can do through their unique sensual organs.

Give the woman you are with warm, sincere words. Give her a feeling of security without being patronising. Relax her, and hold her in your arms. Take your time, remembering that women need time. The kiss is so omportant. Gentle to start with, almost brushing her lips with yours. Feel the passion start to grow and watch her eyes. Look for he gently closing her eyes, with the occasional flutter of the eyelids. Dwell on the kiss - it is more important that you would believe.......

So in whose interest is it to suppress the real love in the world? Everybody's, as long as everybody continues to support the notions. Just look around at this world: Violence, sexual exploitation, drugs, war, poverty, over population, hunger, confusion, war, jealousy, resentment, materialism, pollution.

If only men learned to love women and used their energies on this, the world would be a better place to live. If only women learned who they really are and found men they could trust to literally make love, on their terms.

Gently, guys, gently

I am assuming that the men who are reading this know what a clitoris is? Well if you don't, it is a very important part of a woman's physiology. It is a place where there is a large concentration of nerve cells that transmit signals of touch to the brain which in turn stimulates the areas which release certain hormones. (Ladies - bear in mind that this is a man writing and is probably an oversimplification - but we have to take it from the top, right?).

It works in a different way to a penis, but some have described it as a female penis. The shape and size varies greatly (just like the penis) and normally is shielded by a 'hood', like a foreskin. It resembles a 'beak'. Look it up on an anatomical diagram to see where it is.

Now, this is very important and is incredibly sensitive. Think of the area just below the opening of your penis.

So, now I have told you what it is and where it is, go for it, start rubbing it!

-wrong!

Being so sensitive, you don't even have to touch it to excite it. It is one of the last things to touch, because skin, necks, lips, ear lobes, legs, arms, stomach, hips, breasts are all a part of the way to getting your partner to that higher level of conciousness.

Generally, us guys do not have the sensitivity in our fingertips to touch such a delicate object sensitively enough. Bit of a difference there from the throttle of your Harley to a clitoris.

So, the instrument of choice has to be the tongue. If you have done your build-up right, your breath from your nostril may be enough to bring your partner into the zone. But otherwise, the gentlest of contact from the tip of your tongue can do it. Just watch her face, see her nipples firm and engorge. Given time, she will be gone, off to that other place in her mind.

If your partner masturbates, her hand will sometimes go through the motions, in a kind of reflex. Observe her hand. Hole her hand so that her fingers and thumbs are in your palms. She will automatically guide you as to frequency, intensity and pressure. Without even knowing she is doing it. You get all the guidance you need, bro!

The sides of the clitoris are just as sensitive as the side, but be gently. Occasionally lick the labia (libs) or plunge your tongue inside, just for a change of input. If she physically 'comes', or ejaculates, don't worry - it is actually normal. There is nothing nasty or dirty in this fluid, She might be surprised that she has done this, but encourage her to let it out, without holding back.

If you can speak while you are performing, speak soft reassuring words. Tell her she is safe and that she can do exactly what she wants. Tell her that you want to help her on her journey to a different mental place.

A woman can go on for hours like this. Making love this way will build up your own excitement, because you are extracting the sexual energy and feeding yours. You will normally end up with experiencing a great togetherness where your two souls will meet and you will both be one as you come in unison.